(no subject)

[felicula]

I just called in to find out when they want me in. The surgery is scheduled for 7:30 in the morning. I need to be there at 6.

My nerves, which have been a constant shrill background noise for the past week or so, have just ratcheted up considerably. My stomach is acting like an aspiring flamenco dancer. Why is it that when I'd most like to slip away from the impending reality, my chemistry insists that I feel everything so much more acutely?

I can joke about it all I want, but the fact of the matter is that medical stuff terrifies me in general. Tomorrow petrifies me in particular.

My hands are shaking. Tears are threatening.

Dude. My anxiety can shut up now, please.

I could use a hug.

Comments

[phoenixsong]

*hugtight*

[ladyleo.livejournal.com]

*huge hugs*

[marared.livejournal.com]

/hug!

It's perfectly okay to be scared out of your wits before surgery. God knows I would be. Cry and get it out of your system, have some tea before your cut-off, and take a deep breath! Several of them!

[dawnstar.livejournal.com]

I wish I could come over and give you a hug right now. :(

*sends virtual hugs & love, and calming vibes in your direction*

[solledrache.livejournal.com]

You'll be fine. Deep breaths.

*hugs*

[gray-wolf.livejournal.com]

*FedEx's a crate of 'em* I've got no one out here to use em on! Might as well send em to you guys. :)

[puddin666.livejournal.com]

I will send you all my hugs but I wish I could send my dogs because they give the best hugs.
There is nothing better than to wake up covered in dogs that love you.

xoxo
Puddin'

[dawnstar.livejournal.com]

It'll be all over and you'll be back home before you see this, but I've lit a candle for you and am keeping you in my thoughts this morning.

*love*

Acting for Blackfelicula

[mechanchaos.livejournal.com]

I wish to send the hugs she meant to send last night to everyone who sent them.
HUGS!!!
Unfortunately lj was down last night. I am not sure if it was just our neck of the woods or not. She went it at 7:30 am. We may know more in 2 to 4 hours from then. I will send word when I can.

Re: Acting for Blackfelicula

[phoenixsong]

LJ had a big ol' power outage last night, so it wasn't just you guys s:)

Re: Acting for Blackfelicula

[dawnstar.livejournal.com]

M sent me an IM last night to ask if LJ was down, but I was AFK so I couldn't tell her that yes, it was down everywhere and not just for her.

See you later tonight. *bighugs*

[sealine.livejournal.com]

How is she?

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

***gentle hugs back now that she is home***

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

Thank you lots. ***hugs back gently***

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

I was scared up until the recovery room, when (not yet knowing that it was the recovery room) I wondered in my head whether it was too late to chicken out. I have a vague sense of either me asking or someone telling me it was done. That settled that. :)

***gentle hug***

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

Thank you for the virtual hugs, and the IRL visities and card. Seeing friendly faces was such a nice thing.

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

It went as well as could have been hoped. ***gentle hugs back*** Thank you for the positive thoughts.

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I appreciate every bit of support sent my way. ***gentle hugs back***

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

Lots of thanks and hugs back.

Good pets give excellent hugs. One good thing about being home today was being snuggled by cats. We've got five of them here. Though, they had these odd things on my legs at the hospital that inflated to prevent clotting. I kept dreaming that my cats were walking over my legs, lying down on them, and purring.

At least now I have the real things. Hopefully they won't decide to play trampoline on my newly hysterectified belly.

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much. ***hugs and loves***

Does it tell you how scared I was that both Tuesday night and Wednesday morning I lit pairs of candles and five sticks of incense? At least my imagination came up with a doozy of an expectation. Now It's relaxing to think of how much worse I'd thought it would be.

Re: Acting for Blackfelicula

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

Thank you lots for sending these while I was out of commission. I really felt bad that I couldn't get back to folks the night before going in. I'm sorry they wouldn't let you stay overnight. Thank you for helping me when they got me up to walk, though. ***hugs, kisses, and tons of love***

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

I'm doing as well as could be expected. On a scale from 1-10, pain is between 3-4.

Granted the morphine had me at 1-2 and the percoset at 2-3. They have me making do with ibuprofin and Vicodin. I've had gas pain and menstrual cramps worse than this.

Thank you for caring, and for good thoughts in my direction. ***hugs***

[dawnstar.livejournal.com]

I knew how scared you were based on things you'd been saying up to that point, and the conversation Beth told me about having with you the night before surgery. But I'm also quite relieved that all your fears were for naught. Still, I understand them and would likely have felt the same way.

*hugs & loves*

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

***hugs and loves too***

I didn't really realize just how scared I was until after I phoned in to find out what time I needed to be there. The anxieties were all there, in an undertone, until then.