(no subject)

[felicula]

I have had an endometrial biopsy before today. Sure, it wasn't fun, but it was bearable. Granted, I got through today's, but FUCK, did it really have to be 20 times worse than the last one? I suppose I should be thankful that she was thorough. Very thorough, as in it felt like she must have been done, she pulled it out, then informed me there would be a round two. It was all I could do not to scream, moan I did, but I managed not to scream. I was trying to ask her questions after, but then I nearly passed out. My vision was narrowing and I could feel that dissociation that precedes a faint, so I lay back in time. I got some cold water and a cool, damp cloth for my forehead. mechanchaos and I were left alone so I could get myself together. I cried, lots. By the time I was together enough to sit up and get my clothes on, she was with another patient. So much for finishing the questions today. I was shaky for checking out, and turned into a fountain of tears again in the car. In a week or so, we'll know if this procedure did any good toward finding out what's going on.

mechanchaos was a dear and took me to Golden Port Dim Sum afterward. For the courses of dim sum, I was able to forget my sore and complaining uterus and even smile at the good food. Then we got outside again, where the very act of moving around served to remind me. I keep getting teary at odd moments. In part, it's from the pain. Part of it is because I am scared that it won't tell us anything we didn't know. I may have gone through that for little more than a ruling out of some options. Worse, before I almost passed out, it seemed like she was trying to talk me out of being interested in a hysterectomy. WTF. I mean, what if I get that endometrial oblation or whatever it's called, then something else goes wrong, or for some reason it doesn't work. I want to get this over with. I want it to be finished. I don't want to have more than one painful procedure requiring general anaesthesia. And I sure as hell don't want to be needing these biopsies every couple of years.

Comments

[keepersrosered.livejournal.com]

*Gentle hugs* I hope you feel better very soon.

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

Thank you. ***hugs back***

[mechanchaos.livejournal.com]

Sorry I had to go to work to day. I will be home soon and I finished all the bills:).

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

I understand. It just would've been great to have lots of snuggles, and not to have to be mom tonight. The curl-up-in-a-corner-with-all-the-lights-off headache didn't help the being mom bit.

[dawnstar.livejournal.com]

Ooof. Headaches of doom were in the air yesterday, must be.


I hope you're doing better today. *bighugs&love*

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

My uterus has calmed down significantly, but my head is still on the woobly side. ***hugs and loves back***

[dawnstar.livejournal.com]

Thankfully my headache died down before the show last night, but my left knee has been bothering me since sometime yesterday and I have no idea why. It makes the stairs in my house no fun, though, let me tell you. :/

I'm glad you're doing better, though I wish it was a more complete recovery. *hug tightly*

wandered from Sterling's page....

[solledrache.livejournal.com]

Endo-biopsies are the worst. People don't understand how it feels to be awake, not on pain meds or anasthesia and to have that done.

I've had two, and that was enough to make me beg for full D&Cs ever subsequent time. Knock me out, I'll take time off of work. Just give me pain meds afterwards.

hope you're feeling better, and good luck!

Re: wandered from Sterling's page....

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

Welcome! I apologize this isn't one of the more fun topics I end up in, but I don't mind new folks. If you're interested in peeking more often, and for more pleasant subjects, feel free to add.

Funny thing is, I had one of these about two years ago as well. That time, it was uncomfortable but not unbearable. This time: AAAARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHH! To describe it, I told my husband that it was like my uterus being Roto-Rootered, or to imagine gestating a live, aware, and hungry lycanthrope in there trying to get out.

Luckily my innards aren't complaining nearly so much today. It's my headache-aftermath of the Vicodin I downed after the process that's bogging me down now. ***shrugs*** I can't win 'em. ;)

Really, though, I'm good and ready to part entirely with my reproductive system, been ready for years but this is certainly bolstering my opinion on the matter.

Thanks for the hope and the wishes of luck!

[hbbtrbbtbcnbt.livejournal.com]

*snuuuuuuuuuuuuuugles* I hope they can find what's going on, Love.

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

There's a good chance that no news will be discovered, at which point they will try yet again to convince me that I shouldn't be pushing for a hysterectomy.