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[felicula]

On Sunday, my husband and I signed the membership book at the First Universalist Church of Rochester.

In just a few months, we will have been attending services there pretty regularly for a year. If you had asked me a year ago whether I thought I would be a regular churchgoer someday, I would have laughed heartily. Now Aidan goes to religious education there, mechanchaos submitted a potential postcard design, and I am both a worship associate and singing tenor in the choir. (Yes, I can sing tenor. I can sing alto as well. They need tenors more often than they need altos.)

More importantly than just getting some organized spirituality in my life, I am impressed by the openness and acceptance of the community. On my second time serving as worship associate, I screwed up the order of service, but everyone I talked to was understanding and supportive. It is an excellent place for working to let go of my persistent perfectionism.

I found a place where I feel I belong.

This is a big deal for me. Most of my life, I tried to find a religion where I fit. Though I love paganism deeply, I never found a pantheon I could limit myself to. Though I have deep respect for the discipline of Buddhism, I was not ready to practice Buddhism to the exclusion of my other beliefs. The more I studied a variety of religions, the more acutely I felt the truth at the core of each and the value they hold for their practitioners. No matter what form of spirituality I dabbled in, it would always feel like I was compromising my beliefs to practice it exclusively.

Since attending First Universalist, I have met people who have either had similar experiences or similar matrices of belief as I have had. The kind of spiritual journey I have been on is not only accepted, but encouraged as part of the UU faith. I remain free to use a variety of tools from a number of spiritual paths, yet I gain a community of courageous and understanding folks with a lot to share. It is a win-win situation.

This doesn't mean that I do not still appreciate the value of a Circle to celebrate a Sabbat, the transformative power of zazen, or the ecstasy of a trance state. I maintain a family altar with statues of the Buddha, Kwan Yin, and Bast. (So far -- we may add more sometime.) I keep a wreathed ceramic mask on the wall that is, to me, the face of the Dreaming Unknown. I still keep an eye out for sightings of my totem animal. When I exercise, I can feel the energy raised and try to put it to good use. (I try to keep my focus on either a general atmosphere of healing for the apartment or on improving motivation.)

I can commit myself to First Universalist without giving up any of that. I feel no loss, only gain.

Comments

[dawnstar.livejournal.com]

I could have written this post (save for not having actually signed the book yet), and I love that not only have we both found this community, but it's also a place where we can be both separate and together. :)

*hugs & loves*

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

I agree. I think we started trying it out at about the same time last year. Its wide relevance is appealing. It's nice to see you and kolys there. I am glad that you get so much out of it! ***hugs and loves back***

[dawnstar.livejournal.com]

It was May for us, I believe, but then we missed a month or so at one point during the fall, and only came back to being regular again within the past few months.

I am so on board, though, with how it balances all the different pieces of my Spirituality. Very much as you said.

Something (on a related topic) I'm realizing more and more, though (and was discussed with Oliver today, regarding some of what's going on in our lives currently) is how much Faith I really do have - particularly in the sense of "What's meant to be will be." This is very relevant right now (well, always, really, but you know what I mean).

And I'm feeling very parenthetical tonight, apparently. :)

*more hugs* Btw, I got to chat with Beth some this evening. Will talk to you more about that in non-LJ format (probably AIM tomorrow or something).

[bizarrogirl.livejournal.com]

I feel the same way, warm and fuzzy about the UU church here. Haven't joined, though, as the husband's not there yet, and it's a pain to drag the kids by myself. I go when I can and really enjoy it.

Congrats on finding a new place!

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

Do you mind if I ask which one you go to? I know there's one on Main on the way toward Transit, and one on Elmwood downtown. I've been to a pagan Sabbat in the basement of the Elmwood location and my Dad goes to AA meetings at the one on Main.

It's nice to hear that I would likely find a good home at one of the Buffalo UU churches if we move back someday.

I totally understand how much of a hassle it would be to take two kidlets there on your own. I hope you have more opportunities to go and enjoy it!

[cute-evil-bunny.livejournal.com]

Wow, that is so cool...congrats!!! It is nice to start settling and having a feeling of belonging to something...whether it be a church or group of friends or whatever...it relaxes and calms you and makes you feel better all around.

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

Thanks! It definitely does re: settling into a community of friends or a spiritual community.