(no subject)

[felicula]

My parents had Aidan over from Saturday until Wednesday. When they came to pick him up, we were all concerned. My dad was yellow. He matched his yellow plaid shirt. His eyeballs were yellow. Everything. He acted like he couldn't see it, even though Aidan was creeped out by it. My mom, mechanchaos, and I all told him he was. All he could reply was that he'd had a dentist appointment earlier and the dentist hadn't said anything.

Well, that dentist was a friend of his from AA. While they were picking up Aidan here, he was leaving messages trying to get in touch with my dad and tell him he wasn't looking so hot.

So, my dad got to move his doctor's appointment from this coming Tuesday to this morning. Now he's checked into Buffalo General Hospital for testing. They don't know anything for sure, yet, but his abdomen was swollen and hard, he was still all yellow, and his ankles, arms, and feet were swollen too. They suspect his liver, and with all the drinking I would not be shocked at all. My mom thought it might be cirrhosis. (And after reading that, I think so too.)

mechanchaos turned to me in the car today and asked, "What if this is fatal?" For years now I have wondered if my dad would drink himself to death. Some people argue that people with cirrhosis due to alcohol abuse shouldn't get liver transplants. Who knows what the end result of this is going to be. I'd like to be as mentally prepared as I can be, though. For better or for worse, he's my dad. He's the only dad I've ever known. If this does end up fatal, I will miss him. So will Aidan.

Comments

[thedoorsgirl.livejournal.com]

I agree with you. I think it takes something very significant to bring a person to the point where they want to change and are committed to stopping the drinking. I can't even figure out what would need to happen specifically either. It is probably different for each person. Health problems never seem to be enough. You would think they would be but where addiction is concerned that really seems to be almost the LEAST of a person's worries. Maybe because they think they are only hurting themself so what's the harm? I know that isn't true, but that's the only rationalization I can think of.

David's dad is upset because he has recently found out he will probably be in jail closer to June than April - which is what he originally thought. I have mixed feelings about it. I feel bad for him on one hand but on the other I feel like if he has any chance at all to stop drinking it would involve staying locked up, understanding there was a consequence for his actions, and staying involved in the programs they have him in. The thing is David feels bad for him and said something about how angry his dad is about not getting out earlier and how he wouldn't blame him if he came out and started drinking again because of it. That bothers me. The last thing this man needs is people making excuses for him to come out and drink again. But he doesn't seem to grasp WHY he's in jail and how much his actions have hurt his family and how lucky his is that he didn't kill someone while driving. When I was 12 a foster girl I lived with and her pregnant case-worker were killed by a drunk driver. I am biased now because of that. The guy who drove drunk hardly got a slap on the wrist and I've had harsh feelings about it since...

Anyway, I feel your pain and I understand more than anything your frustration and helplessness in regard to the situation. My step-dad was an alcoholic and my mom finally left him when I was nine. It was a sad situation. He finally just came right out and chose alcohol over us. He didn't have the desire or the ability to quit drinking.

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

When I visited him in the hospital, my dad said he wouldn't be drinking again. He said this had put the fear of God into him. I remember him saying the same thing when he was in for the ulcers.

I hope that David's dad someday understands. ***offers a hug***

[thedoorsgirl.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Hopefully there will be some kind of turn for the better - in both of our situations.

[blackfelicula.livejournal.com]

I hope so too.